Transform Subconscious Saboteurs Into Allies

When I was growing up there was an invisible being in my home we all called "Mr. Nobody." Mr. Nobody was a fail safe entity we blamed everything on when we did not want to take responsibility for whatever had gone wrong.

My mother would ask "who left the plate on the floor, after one of us had a snack and had neglected to put it in the sink, or better yet, the dishwasher, and we would all chime in gaily, “ Mr. Nobody” and laugh.

"Who tossed the dirty clothes on the floor instead of the hamper?! You guessed it, Mr. nobody...

At least in humor we were acknowledging that one of us had done something unconsciously that wasn't acceptable behavior in our family.

But what about the Mr. Nobodys that live subconsciously in our brains and wreak havoc in our daily lives by sabotaging our best intentions to live honest, caring, loving and purposeful lives so that we struggle to take care of ourselves and others we care about, dream our dreams and have the personal power to make them real?

Most of the time we are not aware enough in the moment, as we go through acting out our habits and behaviors, to even realize we are being played by our subconscious saboteurs!

Making our subconscious saboteurs “conscious” is a life's work. It can be very satisfying to hear your subconscious saboteurs’ inner dialogue and, through developing rapport with them, redirect them to respond as you would like them to, instead of having knee-jerk reactions every day, that reinforce feeling like a failure.

"So what," I am hearing you say, "is a subconscious saboteur?"

A subconscious saboteur is a "filed" program stored in the limbic system of Your reptilian back brain, otherwise known as your Subconscious Mind. It is made of a belief that derives from an emotional charge, of either an incident that happened to you, or something you witnessed happening to someone else that has left a deep and lasting impression on you.

It may be connected to a longing for something to happen, that was not happening for you, in the past, or the opposite; a longing to have something “stop happening” that is showing up in your life regularly.

You see, subconscious saboteurs are actually "hired hands." Your consciousness hires them at charged experiential moments because it firmly believes doing so will keep you safe, protected and loved.

Here is an example: Perhaps as a child you had to navigate around an alcoholic father who was, at worst abusive, at best negligent of you or your family members needs. You learned to avoid that parent when he was drunk to protect yourself. However, because of that deep patterning about “father,” you cannot really trust men in intimate relationships because they, in your experience, have been violent or uncaring. Hence, men are not safe for you. The subconscious saboteur in your brain may play this belief out by a.) keeping you from getting close to men at all or b.) may attract the same type of man as your father in an attempt to get you to work the pattern out and heal it. Believe it or not, every subconscious saboteur has an underlying loving purpose.

The next time you see yourself in a self defeating pattern, like the one mentioned above, take 10 or 15 minutes of quiet time for yourself and try this process. You probably want to do this with pen and paper.

Befriending Your Subconscious Saboteur:

PROCESS

   1.) For one full minute, take several long deep breaths. This switches your brain from the Sympathetic Nervous System or the "emergency room" of fight vs. flight to the Parasympathetic Nervous System "healing room" where you feel safe, relaxed and at ease. (This is where we want to live most of the time.)

  2.) Then allow yourself to invite the Sub Conscious Saboteur (SCS) into your “inner sanctum.” Imagine this place to be a special room in your mind that feels safe, lovely and filled with your favorite colors, scents and belongings.
 
  3.) Now give your SCS a seat at a special conference room table, in the middle of this space, across from you.
 
  4.)  Ask your SCS the following question - What is the underlying loving reason you are showing up now in my life?
 
  5.) Then sit back and listen. Invariably it will be to protect you in some way from something your SCS believes will do you harm.

  6.) The next part is a bit trickier and is why people may seek out a guide to move through this process. Tell your SCS that you deeply appreciate that it has been honoring its old job description, you signed it up for "once upon a time" when you needed protection or attention from it, but NOW "this is what you want or need” from it.

   7.) Then listen to its objections, concerns and fears for your well being it has for you, carefully. Let it know that you want to stay in connection with its wisdom and concerns for you, but there is a new job description you need it to step into...for the new self you want to express.
 
   8.) Tell your SCS the positive, empowering ways it can work for you now.
 
   9.) Take a few moments and “future pace” your Sub Conscious Mind into the new job description incorporating all your senses in a positive way to “anchor in” how you want to feel whenever your past issue shows up in the future!

CASE IN POINT:

Here is an example of how this would be implemented if your issue was abandonment issues with men:

Let's say your SCS never lets you get close to men because you always seem to attract unavailable men (like your emotionally unavailable father) who are initially interested in you, hook you, need you and then abandon you.

  1.)  Take several breaths to relax and tune in
  2.) Invite the SCS into your inner sanctum
  3.) Ask it to take a seat across from you at your conference table
  4.) Ask it “What is your underlying loving reason for showing up in my current life now.”

(Note:  If it doesn’t easily come through, try writing the question with your usual writing hand and then place the pen in your non writing hand and scribble out the answer. This is a profound way to tap into the Subconscious Minds beliefs and feelings.)

Here is one scenario you might “hear.”
As you sit with your  saboteur it becomes clear that the SCS's job for you is to keep drawing you to the same type of man as your father in an attempt to redo the father nurturing pattern that never happened for you; hence, reinforcing your pattern of "looking for love in all the wrong places."

 5.) Sit back and listen to how it is protecting you.

Ex: Your SCS wants you to have the father need filled very passionately, because it is a primal need for a child to have a loving, caring father. So your SCS keeps attracting and sorting through men to attempt to redo that need, but with the same type of father you had, because it associates paternal/male love with emotional unavailability. It may also believe that you must not have been worth your father’s time and attention, or else he would have given it to you! Remember the Subconscious mind is like a child, very self oriented, black and white, emotional and may jump to faulty thinking conclusions that inform the way you view the world, attracting what you no longer want subconsciously.
 
In this example the father parenting need never gets met because the SCS is stuck in choosing the same type of male figure as the unavailable father, which validates your deepest fear that “men are unavailable, unreliable, selfish and won’t love you for yourself and continues then, like radar to attract in the world this deeply held Sub Conscious belief.

  6.) Tell your SCS that you deeply appreciate it for honoring the old job description you gave it “once upon a time” when you needed protection for some reason, but now you have a NEW job description that suits your needs as the grown up you are today.

Ex: In the past I had you bring men to me who wanted to be in a relationship with me but always ended up rejecting or abandoning me because that is what I believed I deserved since it was all I experienced from my father, my primary male influencer in my childhood. But now I know I am worthy of receiving real, consistent love, care and intimacy with a male partner, so I need your help to change that.

  7.) As you have this inner conversation with your SCS, realize that this is a dialogue and you may need to convince your SCS that your new job description is appropriate to the person you are now. You may have to convince it that you are strong enough, clear enough, powerful enough, etc, for it to take on this new description for you. After you have communicated back and forth and your SCS is ready to hear you out and receive you new desires, (Do this by journaling or speaking out loud moving between two seats, Gestalt style, where one seat is where you sit when you speak from your perspective and the other seat is where you sit from the SCS’s perspective. Both approaches are valuable ways to handle this dialogue. Some people can do it all in their mind, internally, but if you do, at least write down the new job description points, regardless of how you process parts 7 and 8.)

  8.) Give your SCS a new job description of what you want to reinforce. Using the example about male relationships it might include the goal of your Sub Conscious mind which is: to protect you and keep you happy and at peace. As you re-educate your SCS about what will do that for you in present time, it will influence you, to that end.

Here is an example of a new Sub Conscious Mind (SCM) job description with specific points relevant to this person’s issue of abandonment concerns with men, as outlined in 1-5 below. Note we are no longer referring to the Sub Conscious Saboteur (SCS) but are now calling it the Sub Conscious Mind. (SCM)

New Job Description:
 
         1.) From this moment forward, SCM,  you only bring men into my life who love and respect themselves in a healthy, balanced way and have shown that they love and respect their family, friends and past partners in healthy, giving, caring, balanced ways.
        2.) Bring men to me who have a proven history of having clear, honest, loving communication and actions with people, who make a good and decent living in a field that is fulfilling for them, are truly interested in what matters to me; shares my values and interests, has similar goals and dreams and is an all around loving, kind, dynamic, healthy match for me.
        3.) I want you to help me know and believe how valuable I am and help me to have strong, clear boundaries that only allow deserving men into my inner circle.
        4.) You will let me know intuitively which gentlemen deserve my time and attention and who I can pass by.
       5.) When I am relating with a man, I will speak my truth, trust my inner judgment and guidance and love, honor and respect myself at all times.

 9.) Then, you would take a few moments to "future pace" your SCM into its new job description, enjoying its new relevant job! Job satisfaction is important for your SCM because it's aim is to take care of you at the highest level. It just needs to know how it can best support you in present time and then it will work together with you harmoniously, getting you what you need.

How to transform a SCS into an ally so you can live a happier, healthier, more productive life!

In my Hypnotherapy work with clients, people often come to me to connect to their subconscious saboteurs, which show up as personal blocks, trapped emotions, harmful habits or “stinkin’ thinkin’ in daily life. I use a hypnotic process we call "Parts Therapy." This takes one back to the moment the SCS got "hired"  into its current job description and allows me to interactively dialog with that and other parts while in hypnosis. We then "run and change" dramas and traumas that happened at that time and have the SCS take on a healthier job description of your choosing that is appropriate to what you need now. Self hypnosis at home for 30 days is helpful to anchor in the new job description and create lasting changes.
 
I have also created a body of transformational healing work I call "Heal the Cause Hypnosis." This work employs the use of muscle response testing or applied kinesiology to "ask your body" memory to reveal trapped emotions stuck in the body's meridian energy system (in the past) and explore the resulting "decision" the subconscious mind has made in its desire to protect you, that may be causing your difficulties in the present.

“HEAL THE CAUSE HYPNOSIS” - How it works

First we muscle test for the trapped emotion. Then we ask the body for the corresponding story that goes with it. Often there is memory of the story that goes along with the trapped emotion.

Once found, I guide you to do the Emotional Freedom Technique which involves tapping on the end points of the meridians on the body, while saying specific phrases that zero in on the current concern you want to release. EFT has been found to down-regulate stress hormones and up-regulate immunity. It is an “Autonomic Nervous System Deregulation” tool. In other words it is a powerful way to release and clear out old upsets, trapped emotions and negative beliefs that no longer work for you, on the core level. Doing EFT creates relief, release and space to become who you are. Once the past negative charge has been released you can freely envision what you want to focus on increasing in your life, instead of spending precious time being caught in past negative thoughts, feelings and behaviors.
 
Finally I relax my clients with some healing music and a guided imagery experience that is personalized to Once my clients are feeling the relief of letting go of past emotional concerns or negative beliefs, I "future pace" them using all of their senses and positive key phrases and we import a new job description into their subconscious mind for their SCM, now a forsworn ally! This visualization creates a new neural pathway in the brain which fires up when you do self hypnosis at home. This reactivates the new beliefs you want to reinforce in your brain, body and emotions and is easy and fulfilling to do before you drift off to sleep each night.

People who opt for "Heal the Cause Hypnosis" choose this transformational self healing approach because they prefer to do work awake and using the wisdom of their body’s knowledge of trapped emotions which can be accessed through muscle response testing. This process let’s the body reveal the trapped emotion and resulting story and beliefs that has caused people to think, feel or behave in ways that no longer suit them.
 
If you would like to explore something you need to change, but you just can't find your way through it, I am offering a one hour, in person FREE consultation to help you explore a way to "free yourself to BE yourself.
 
Who am I? My name is Debra Troy and I am a certified, registered and insured Consulting Hypnotist with the National Guild of Hypnotists with over 28 years of Hypnotherapy experience. I am certified in Advanced Clinical Hypnotherapy, Alchemical Hypnotherapy, Kalos Health Facilitation and many medical and clinical hypnosis specialties as seen on this website. 

To schedule your free consultation call Debra Troy at 609) 397-1944. My offices are in Lambertville, N.J. and Pipersville, Pa. I am also available to do distance transformational Heal the Cause Hypnosis sessions on Skype.